Discerning a call to consecrated life is as difficult as finding a spouse is for those called to marriage. There are so many paths, so many forms, so many orders and institutes. Many women find themselves looking at secular institutes because they don’t feel called to, or do not meet the requirements for other forms of consecrated life, such as religious institutes or consecrated virginity. Secular institutes are a newer form of consecrated life that are mostly unknown or, at best, poorly understood among most spiritual directors and vocation directors. The best approach to discerning this path is to speak directly to members of the institutes you are considering. For the DeSales Secular Institute, the most important aspects of consideration are mission, community, and spiritual formation.
The Mission Question: Are you on fire for the New Evangelization? Do you seek to go into the secular world in order to cross paths with atheists, agnostics, and fallen away Catholics in order to bring them to Christ? Do you want to live and work in places where you will meet such people on a regular basis? Do you desire to sanctify the world by encouraging just practices that respect the dignity of the human person, whether it be in government or in the offices and conference rooms where you work? If this sounds attractive to you, then you may have a call to this mission.
The Community Question: Do you thirst for spiritual sisters to lean on, to share your faith with, to learn from and to teach from your own experiences? Do you seek women who, like you, have missionary zeal for souls? Do you desire to share your joy of living chastely as a bride of Christ in a hyper-sexed culture? Are you willing to work at starting, building and maintaining relationships with women who are geographically distant but spiritually connected? Are you able to use modern means of communication, such as email and video conferencing to stay in touch? Are you able to travel at least once a year for the mandatory annual retreat? If these are not barriers for you, then this may be the community for you.
The Spiritual Formation Question: Are you acquainted with the writings of St. Francis de Sales, Bishop and Doctor of the Church? Do you seek to show the love of Christ through a gentle strength, in an increasingly hostile world? Do you believe that poverty, chastity and obedience can be lived in the world, in a life surrendered to the will of God? Do you desire to develop a contemplative, prayerful life alongside an active and self-giving life? Are prayer and the sacraments central to your faith? If you are familiar with the writings of DeSales and are drawn to this spirituality, then this may be your vocation. If you have not read any of his works, then you should first read his spiritual classic, “The Introduction to the Devout Life” to determine if this is a spirituality that brings out the best in you.
God has prepared a path for everyone that will guide them to sainthood. If you reflected on these questions honestly, and you don’t quite “fit,” then don’t try to cram a square peg into a round hole. Just because this isn’t your path doesn’t mean you don’t have one. Return to your spiritual director and continue to surrender your life to God’s will, a sure path to peace and joy. If you answered these questions and felt like this could be a match made in heaven, then let’s talk!
